Private Gym: Kegels for men -- with penis weights!

I've stressed the importance of pelvic floor (AKA Kegel) exercises for both male and female anatomies, but I admit that I haven't given as much focus to male bodies. Now there's a complete exercise program for male pelvic muscle training -- Private Gym -- including weight training for the penis!

Stronger pelvic muscles give you more blood flow to the penis, stronger and more rigid erections, better urinary and rectal control, and stronger orgasms and ejaculatory force. Like any other muscles, they respond to strength training. Private Gym offers both a "basic" ($59.99) and a "complete" ($99.99) training program, both with free shipping.

Both include a DVD, an instruction manual, and a book, Male Pelvic Fitness: Optimizing Sexual & Urinary Health. The book presents a ton of anatomical and sexual function information, plus cool factoids that you can throw out at a sex-positive dinner party, such as what "phallocarps" are and which animal ejaculates 4-5 gallons of semen.

This program lets you learn and practice the step-by-stem program with a follow-along DVD. It's very well done, with clear illustrations and explanations. (I would have preferred it without the background music, though, which I found repetitive and distracting.)

The difference between the programs? The basic gives you a 4-week, progressive, step-by-step program.  It's good, especially for pelvic floor training beginners.

However, I recommend the complete program, which includes the basic plus additional exercises and 4 weeks of resistance training, which you do with the included weights. (Only the complete program includes the weights.)

Yes, weights. You put the weighted ring on your penis and perform the squeeze-release exercises (both slow and rapid) along with the DVD. As your pelvic muscles strengthen, you can add the additional weight which attaches magnetically. You'll need a rigid erection (with or without medication) in order to use the weights. (You don't need a rigid erection for the basic program.)

I know, penis weights may seem like a gimmick. But they're not, I assure you. Don't take my word for it -- here's what my 57-year-old male tester had to say:

It’s great. It takes you through the things you can do to build up those muscles. This program with your choice of a male or female voice tells you exactly how, when, and for how long, and gives you a signal that makes it so much easier. It’s like the reason you hire a fitness trainer – sure, you can lift weights on your own, but a trainer helps you.

 The book is great because it talks about why you’re doing this and gives background information, in easy to understand terms.  

When you get more advanced, you can use the weight system. The weights are comfortable, easy to slip on, and they work.  

The whole program is well thought out, and very easy and comfortable to use. It’s a great system. I think it would benefit just about anybody. 

I was having trouble with getting erections. Using this program, my erections became as firm on their own as when I was using Viagra! 

Thank you, Private Gym, for sending me this program for my tester and me to review. This is a powerful tool, especially the complete program, because the weights can make a huge difference.

Because the Private Gym folks know how this program will benefit our age group, they are offering readers of this blog a whopping 25% discount. Just type the coupon code Joan25 in the coupon box when you order. I hope you try it. Stick with the program and let us know how it goes.

Warning re Kegel Exercise "Tools" for Better Sex

UPDATE to IMPORTANT UPDATE, 4/4/13:

I've had a nice email exchange with Je Joue's customer service. They assure me that this was a manufacturing defect that they caught and rectified, and this problem should not ever happen again. They are replacing my broken Ami with apologies. 

I appreciate their responsiveness, and I'm happy to say that I can again recommend the Ami. 

If you have the Ami 1 and I've got you worried, try tugging on the cord. If it doesn't come loose, your Ami is safe and good to go, Je Joue assures me. I'm not deleting either my "shocked" experience nor my previous review, just adding this to the mix so you have a whole story. 

Previous IMPORTANT UPDATE, 3/27/13:

I am truly shocked. I just peeked in the box holding my Ami Silicone Kegel Exercisers, and I discovered that the ball of the Ami 1 -- the largest and lightest of the three -- had become completely disconnected from the pull cord.

Whatever glue had fastened the two sections had dried or dissolved or something -- there was no way to reconnect the parts.

Now understand, this did not happen due to overuse or misuse. I actually only used the other two because their diameters are more comfortable for me. So this broken exerciser was only used once, and then remained in its box for the next three months.

I am appalled: What if this disconnection had happened not in the box, but inside a vagina? How could you ever get hold of the slippery, lube-covered ball to pull it out? Could you even squeeze and shoot with enough force to pop it out? Not if you're an older woman with a tight vaginal entrance. Yikes.

We've all heard shudder-provoking tales of items that ER doctors have pulled out of body orifices. I'd rather not consult a doctor about extracting a Kegel exerciser.

I left the rest of this 12/28/12 post intact so that you can get valuable content from it, but I can no longer recommend the Ami Kegel Exercisers.

ORIGINAL POST:

I just posted "Kegel Magic: Pelvic Floor Shape-Up For Better Sex" on the Post 50 channel of Huffington Post here -- describing how Kegels can strengthen your pelvic floor muscles and make sex more enjoyable through easier arousal, stronger orgasms, and more pleasure, with step-by-step instructions for doing them right.

In that article, I referred readers here for an introduction to Kegel exercisers that make Kegels more effective and entertaining. Here are some tools that will make you look forward to your Kegel "workout"! (These are not vibrators -- all movement comes from your pelvic floor muscle power.)

Ami Silicone Kegel Exercisers.You get three separate exercisers in this kit, each a different size, shape, and weight.

• Ami 1 - 1.65oz, 4.37" (length with cord), 1.41" (length excluding cord), 1.41" diameter
• Ami 2 - 2.75oz, 6.14" (length with cord), 3.14" (length excluding cord), 1.25" diameter
• Ami 3 - 3.73oz, 5.66" (length with cord), 2.75" (length excluding cord), 1.1" diameter

JeJoue, creator of Ami, suggests that you start with Ami 1 (the single ball) and work your way up to Ami 3. If your vaginal opening is tight, however, skip Ami 1 because it's the biggest, and being ball shaped instead of tapered, you may have discomfort inserting it. Go right to Ami 2, a double ball which is heavier, but smaller. Ami 3 is the smallest and heaviest.

Why are the so-called harder levels made smaller? Instead of just lying on your back squeezing your Ami, get up and go about your day, Ami in place, squeezing as you drive, walk, compute, do Zumba. The heavier the Ami, the more you have to resist it falling out. (Practice a lot at home before you take it into town!)

You can also use your Ami of choice while you pleasure yourself with a clitoral vibrator. If you like, put one finger in the loop and "yo yo" your Ami, pulling it partway out, using your PC muscles to pull it back in. Fun!

Aneros EVI Hands-Free G-Spot Massager. Insert the bulbous end of this odd looking object in the vagina so that the longest part of the top (heading towards my thumb from my index finger in this photo) is over your clitoris. The idea is that by doing your Kegels, the EVI gives you pelvic floor muscle resistance and stimulates your clitoris at the same time.

I wanted to love this -- it's a great idea and a well made, bodysafe product.

But although I could use it well as a Kegel exerciser, my particular body shape kept the extending part hovering over my clitoris, barely touching it or not touching it at all, when it was perfectly in place vaginally. I could press it down on the clitoral extension, but there goes the hands-free attribute.

The label makes this claim: ""Designed to Fit ALL Women... Both the G-Spot and clitoris are perfectly stimulated in a toe curling rhythm."

I wish this were true, but for me, it wasn't. Other reviews have praised the EVI as a Kegel exerciser, and I concur with that, but I wonder if others actually felt their toes curling with it. FYI, the EVI is 1.5” at the widest insertable part, and if your vaginal opening is tight, you might find it uncomfortable to insert and pull out.



Some useful tips:

• If you wear a vaginal estrogen ring, take it out before inserting these Kegel exercisers for comfort and ease of insertion.
• You may feel increased bladder pressure wearing the Ami or EVI. Remove it before peeing, or, in the case of Ami, at least pull the string out of the way or you may splash where you don't want to splash.

Thank you , Good Vibrations, for providing samples of EVI and Ami.

If you've got strong pelvic floor muscles, your next step is weight lifting with a barbell -- Betty Dodson's Vaginal Barbell, that is, available from Dodson's website. This hefty, stainless steel tool weighs almost a pound.

For your first workout with Betty's Barbell, lie on your back, knees bent, feet planted. You can insert either end, depending on comfort and preference, and hold onto the other end. Then let go, and use your PC muscles to keep the barbell in position..
When you do your Kegels and squeeze the barbell, you'll see it lift a bit.

Once your pelvic floor muscles are really strong -- or to find out how strong they are! -- try standing up and see if you can keep the barbell from falling to the floor for a minute. Read Betty Dodson's instructions for using her Barbell here: (Read about Joan's memorable meeting with Betty Dodson here.)

If you've tried these or other Kegel exerciser products, please add your comments and recommendations. (Please, no retailers promoting your own store.)

Enjoy your Kegels!

Kegel Magic: Pelvic Floor Shape-Up For Better Sex

Diagram from Wikipedia

 January is "shape-up" month, with every lifestyle magazine and website proclaiming a new exercise program.

I've got a shape-up program for you, too, and though it's a muscle workout, you won't see the results in the mirror or show them off to your friends -- except for intimate friends -- and then the results will be felt, not seen.

This workout strengthens the muscles of your pelvic floor -- the "PC" (pubococcygeus) muscles that run along the pelvic floor and surround the entire vagina. These are the muscles that contract during orgasm.

 Regular pelvic floor workouts, AKA Kegel exercises, lead to more enjoyable sex: easier arousal, stronger orgasms, more pleasure. If that's not enough, strengthening the pelvic floor muscles also protects against urinary incontinence. (Ah, now I have your attention!)

You've been told, "Do your Kegels," but you haven't been told how to do them most effectively. Here are step-by-step instructions for your pelvic floor workout, thanks to Myrtle Wilhite, MD, MS and staff of A Woman's Touch Sexuality Resource Center in Madison, Wisconsin:

Step-by-Step Kegels

1. Lie down on your back in a comfortable place with your knees bent. Lying down takes the weight off your pelvic floor and leads to earlier success. Have your tool (if you are using one) and lubricant with you.

• If you're using a tool, coat it with lubricant and insert it into your vagina until it comfortably slips into place just behind the pubic bone. You can't push it in too far; it cannot get lost inside of you.


• If you're using your finger(s), wash your hands first, then coat your finger(s) with lubricant. Next, insert your finger(s) about 2 inches into your vagina. 
 
• You can also practice Kegels with nothing at all inside your vagina, or a hand placed on your perineum, to feel the muscle contract from the outside.

2. Contract your pelvic floor muscles. It will feel like you're pulling up and in toward your belly button. Don't push out, unless specifically advised by a health care provider. If you're using a tool, you should feel it rise a bit. If you're using your finger, you should feel a gentle tightening around the finger. Try to keep your leg, buttock, and abdominal muscles relaxed, and remember to breathe normally throughout the exercise.

3. Hold the lift for a count of 5. If you're using a tool, you can add resistance by pulling gently on it as you continue using your muscles to pull the tool inward and upward. Remember to breathe!

4. Relax your muscles.

5. IMPORTANT: After each contraction, take a deep belly breath. Inhale deeply and gently blow out the air while you relax your pelvis completely. This deep relaxation is just as important as the other steps, because the deep belly breath relaxes the muscles that are not under your conscious control.

For much more about Kegels from A Woman's Touch, click here.

The deep relaxation phase is often omitted when we're told how to do our Kegels, but they're as important to practice as the contraction. Many women of our age, especially after a period of celibacy, experience what feels like tightening or shrinking of the vaginal opening because the muscles don't fully release. This can interfere with our enjoyment of penetrative sex.

"Pay equal attention to the contraction and the relaxation of the muscles that surround the vagina in particular," says sex educator and counselor Ellen Barnard, MSSW, co-owner of A Woman's Touch. "Otherwise you may find that these muscles are stiff and inflexible, which will also get in the way of comfortable penetration when you are ready to have it."

You can practice with your own fingers, a partner's fingers or penis (fun for both of you!), or a sex product designed for vaginal penetration (that's the "tool" mentioned above) such as a dildo, dilator, or a special Kegel exerciser.

You can also practice your Kegels without tools or fingers, even on the go: standing in the grocery line, driving, walking, working at your desk, during your Pilates, yoga, or dance class. If you're doing them in public, be sure you've mastered the part about not contracting your buttocks, or anyone standing behind you will see what you're doing!

Although I've directed this article to women, Kegels are also important for men. These muscles located in the perineum, the area between the scrotum and the anus, contract during a man's orgasm. Kegels can make sex more pleasurable for men with age-related, less intense orgasms.

"By strengthening the muscles of the perineum, you will pump more blood to this vital area, achieve greater ejaculatory control, and increase the intensity of your orgasms," says urologist Dudley S. Danoff, MD, FACS, author of Penis Power: The Ultimate Guide to Male Sexual Health.  (Read my interview with Dr. Danoff here.)

Kegels are recommended for all ages, and they're especially important for Boomers now and through our later years.

Kegels can be fun as well as useful. Though there's nothing sexual about the pelvic floor exercises per se, there's nothing to stop you from pleasuring yourself or your partner while you do them, or right afterwards!

(This post first appeared 12/28/12 on the Post50 channel of The Huffington Post here.)

 Please read the companion piece to this one: Kegel Exercise "Tools" for Better Sex to learn about cool tools that will make your Kegels lots of fun.